I have thoughts and desires replicating within me, and I cannot seem to contain them. I cannot even write of them. It is not writer's block, it simply is the inability to grab those thoughts, mold them into words, and weave them into a piece. I cannot master them yet, they are moving at a strange and unfamiliar pace. Love, hate, anxiety, fear, calm, peace, expectation, chaos...
I am in a new place with old memories and experiences to get rid of. It is rather challenging to start a new life with the old one refusing to leave the corners of one's soul. I feel a new cycle of transformation creeping in my veins, my skin, my bones. I hate and love it every time. I should stop gathering more carcass for the vultures. I should cast those decaying memories into the ocean, deep and secure, so I won't need to bring flowers and visit them on graves of earth and soil.
Very well. I shall rest on the Truth that my blessings have my name on them, and that the God of all creation looks upon me with joyful hope and adoration. I shall slowly ease into my whole self, and fit snugly in God's hands. I shall become my dream, my desires, my One True Self.
I will live. And live some more.
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