It's about time...

Sometimes I wish I could just go to a place where I could start all over again, and be the best I could be.

Growing up without any prejudice from within, children usually discover their talents, their intellect, and who they really are in nurturing and supportive environments. The first school play, recital, football game, spelling bee, etc become natural playgrounds where self expression and discovery are enhanced and enjoyed. Children are happiest when they are playing with friends and family.

Somewhere along the way, that child gets lost when there is not enough support, further training, and affirmation from family or authority figures (teachers and mentors). Negative experiences complicate the situation, and confusion sets in. He grows up not fully confident of who he is, what he knows, what he can do, and what it does to an audience. The creative mind, instead, builds a wall and locks itself from the stage, the field, the museums, the arenas.

Sometime somewhere in adult life, that creativity re-emerges. Life experience, travel, right and wrong decisions, inspiring friends and role models, awaken the genius from within. The adult has met the child who can paint, sing, spell, play, run, write,create, think, and do marvelous feats of wonder. The adult remembers who he really is, what he really wants.

Tonight I cried because I've kept the child in me captive for quite a long time. I thought I was protecting him by hiding him from harsh criticisms, disapproval, poverty, disappointment, and other negative talk. I cried because I miss playing and enjoying my intelligence, my talents, my strengths: the greatest version of my most authentic self.

I don't want to play other people's games anymore. I was born in this Universe with my own special unique set of skills and characteristics.

I want to be a kid again: no biases against race, color, gender, status, age, and physical appearance. I just want to have fun, play, create, express, and be me - unaffected by other people's opinions, expectations, punishments and rewards. I just want to be my happiest self. Again.

It's about time I let my creative self show what makes me happy, what makes me special, what makes those around me feel alive when I am at my very best.